© 2009 Stan Spire
Yesterday evening a woman from Iceland was supposed to appear before a federal judge here in Plattsburgh. She had been detained at the border by federal agents. Whoever was watching her – immigration officials or U.S. marshals – fell for the old “I have to go to the bathroom” bit. Instead of powdering her nose, she took a powder.
So local law enforcement went into action. Downtown Plattsburgh was cordoned off. She wasn't going to get away. Of course, if someone had been doing their job and had some smarts, her escape wouldn't have happened.
I found out about this later. The first indication I had that something was going on was when a helicopter kept flying over my place, again and again, chop-chop-chop. All I want is some peace and quite but that solitude kept getting chopped up.
When I went out for a walk, the helicopter was still flying around, shining a searchlight into the backyards of various homes.
OK, I can see this stuff happening when an armed and loaded terrorist is on the loose, getting ready to set off some bombs. But when law enforcement officials sent out an alert about the escapee, they stated that they believed the woman was “not dangerous.” She ended up being caught outside the city limits after a couple of alert citizens spotted her and called the state police. The cordon and the helicopter search were useless.
Once again a lot of fuel was burned by the Homeland Security helicopter. If the border has to be constantly protected from terrorists, then why does the HS copter have enough time to aid the local police? It's not the first time this has happened.
It seems the HS copter needs to find some action to justify its existence. Hell, why not sent it out to locate a lost puppy or kitty cat?
This reminds me of an incident from years ago. Law-enforcement officers were given some new toys to play with, paramilitary uniforms and weapons. The black-clad officers were scouring Plattsburgh for a fugitive. A citizen would look out the window and see a fully-armed body-armored stranger running by his house. There was an uproar because citizens were terrorized by the overreaction. They didn't know what the paramilitary types were doing.
But give the boys some shiny new toys – uniforms, weapons, helicopters – and they have to play.
Fun financed by your taxes. And while they play with their toys, basic and practical law enforcement become secondary – and second-rate.
That's how a woman could escape with the old bathroom ploy.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Orange Easter Bunny and the Second Coming
© 2009 Stan Spire
Ever read something so wacky that the term “LSD flashback” pops in your head?
I don't think conservative Baptist preacher Rev. R.W. Fry, D.D. dropped acid during his younger years. It's just that you read one of his weekly columns and your head does a metaphysical spin.
Each Friday Rev. Fry runs an ad in the Plattsburgh daily (news)paper that features a short essay in which he tries to tie in an unusual news event with scripture. Sometimes the connection is really contorted.
In his latest commentary he talks about an incident in Oregon last Easter involving the driver of a Mercedes who hit a woman and left the scene. The victim was six feet tall; she was dressed as an orange rabbit, her vehicle a pedicab. According to Fry, the pedicab was lit up with “deflectors” [sic] and a flashing red light. There was no reason for the Mercedes driver not to see the victim, even though that was the excuse he gave to the judge..
Then Fry writes: “This sort of reminds me in a rather peculiar kind of way what we read in Matthew 25:13 – 'Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.'”
So this must be that Jesus is coming back as a six foot tall orange rabbit on a pedicab.
Signs and wonders, indeed.
Ever read something so wacky that the term “LSD flashback” pops in your head?
I don't think conservative Baptist preacher Rev. R.W. Fry, D.D. dropped acid during his younger years. It's just that you read one of his weekly columns and your head does a metaphysical spin.
Each Friday Rev. Fry runs an ad in the Plattsburgh daily (news)paper that features a short essay in which he tries to tie in an unusual news event with scripture. Sometimes the connection is really contorted.
In his latest commentary he talks about an incident in Oregon last Easter involving the driver of a Mercedes who hit a woman and left the scene. The victim was six feet tall; she was dressed as an orange rabbit, her vehicle a pedicab. According to Fry, the pedicab was lit up with “deflectors” [sic] and a flashing red light. There was no reason for the Mercedes driver not to see the victim, even though that was the excuse he gave to the judge..
Then Fry writes: “This sort of reminds me in a rather peculiar kind of way what we read in Matthew 25:13 – 'Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.'”
So this must be that Jesus is coming back as a six foot tall orange rabbit on a pedicab.
Signs and wonders, indeed.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
When Will Alessandra Stanley Be Shitcanned?
© 2009 Stan Spire
If the New York Times is the Newspaper of Record, then why does it keep employing a screw up like Alessandra Stanley who has added erroneous information to the record?
Google her name and you'll soon find all the mistakes she's made over the years. Apparently an editor has to babysit her so she gets the facts right. Why should someone so sloppy keep her position when there are more qualified and dedicated people out of work who could do a better job half-asleep?
What will happen the next time she gets her facts wrong? A raise and a promotion?
If the New York Times is the Newspaper of Record, then why does it keep employing a screw up like Alessandra Stanley who has added erroneous information to the record?
Google her name and you'll soon find all the mistakes she's made over the years. Apparently an editor has to babysit her so she gets the facts right. Why should someone so sloppy keep her position when there are more qualified and dedicated people out of work who could do a better job half-asleep?
What will happen the next time she gets her facts wrong? A raise and a promotion?
They Want To Help You
© 2009 Stan Spire
The news team at the local TeeVee station are saints. 24/7 they run a spot about “Project Economy,” a special feature of the newscast that helps you in these troubling financial times.
Let's face it: those meat puppet newsreaders ain't philanthropists. The only economic project they care about is sucking you in to watch their program and keep the ratings up. Up ratings mean that they can keep their jobs.
Journalists as social workers? Hah! Why don't they pawn themselves off as superheroes? I can see it now: TheJustice Journalism League of America.
The news team at the local TeeVee station are saints. 24/7 they run a spot about “Project Economy,” a special feature of the newscast that helps you in these troubling financial times.
Let's face it: those meat puppet newsreaders ain't philanthropists. The only economic project they care about is sucking you in to watch their program and keep the ratings up. Up ratings mean that they can keep their jobs.
Journalists as social workers? Hah! Why don't they pawn themselves off as superheroes? I can see it now: The
Shocking Headline
© 2009 Stan Spire
“Newspaper circulation falling fast”
I'm sitting there, just stunned by the headline. According to the AP article: “The decline in newspaper circulation is accelerating.” How can this be?, I asked myself.
Then I put the newspaper back on the rack and read another free one at the public library.
“Newspaper circulation falling fast”
I'm sitting there, just stunned by the headline. According to the AP article: “The decline in newspaper circulation is accelerating.” How can this be?, I asked myself.
Then I put the newspaper back on the rack and read another free one at the public library.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
“News” Value
© 2009 Stan Spire
I put the word “news” in quotes for a reason.
Alarmists say that without the “news” – particularly “news”papers – our democracy will suffer.
Bullshit. Putting aside the fact that we don’t live in a democracy, the “news” has been exposing crime and corruption and lies and all sorts of sins forever – and in the end all that changes is that a new cast of perpetrators arrive on the scene while some of the old ones just skate free.
“News” is a relative term. What is “news” to you – information of value – might be meaningless to me. For example, take the sports section – please.
The only time a person cares about “news” is when it provides information on something that might intrude – or does intrude – his comfort zone. His taxes going up? That hits home. Some banana republic going through a violent revolution? So what? As long as it doesn’t affect the price of bananas at the supermarket – big yawn.
Most people can’t be bothered with “news.” Celebrity gossip and sports info – that beats out the “news” most of the time. “News” makes people uncomfortable. So why will someone now pay for it online when it just gets him upset and invades his comfort zone? That’s negative value.
Too many people like to be ignorant. They want simple answers, not complex stories. Look at how the yahoos have been going on about “death panels” and other nonsense during the health care “discussion.” They don’t want nuance in reporting. They don’t want even to see the word “nuance.” That means they have to use a dictionary to figure out what that word means and that hurts their pointy little heads.
I put the word “news” in quotes for a reason.
Alarmists say that without the “news” – particularly “news”papers – our democracy will suffer.
Bullshit. Putting aside the fact that we don’t live in a democracy, the “news” has been exposing crime and corruption and lies and all sorts of sins forever – and in the end all that changes is that a new cast of perpetrators arrive on the scene while some of the old ones just skate free.
“News” is a relative term. What is “news” to you – information of value – might be meaningless to me. For example, take the sports section – please.
The only time a person cares about “news” is when it provides information on something that might intrude – or does intrude – his comfort zone. His taxes going up? That hits home. Some banana republic going through a violent revolution? So what? As long as it doesn’t affect the price of bananas at the supermarket – big yawn.
Most people can’t be bothered with “news.” Celebrity gossip and sports info – that beats out the “news” most of the time. “News” makes people uncomfortable. So why will someone now pay for it online when it just gets him upset and invades his comfort zone? That’s negative value.
Too many people like to be ignorant. They want simple answers, not complex stories. Look at how the yahoos have been going on about “death panels” and other nonsense during the health care “discussion.” They don’t want nuance in reporting. They don’t want even to see the word “nuance.” That means they have to use a dictionary to figure out what that word means and that hurts their pointy little heads.
Numbers Game
© 2009 Stan Spire
Item #1: Full page ad in the Monday, Sept. 21, 2009 edition of the Jerkwater Journal, the Plattsburgh’s daily newspaper. Another propaganda piece by the NAA, the Newspaper Association of America.
In big bold print: NUMBERS LIKE THESE ALWAYS LOOK GOOD ON PAPER.
Below the proclamation some people stand in a neat row, each reading the dead trees format.
While acknowledging that “the newspaper business has faced unprecedented challenges” in the last two years, the ad states the newspaper media (print and digital) is still a strong presence and will emerge after the “current environment” as a stronger multi-platform source of information.
Then there’s a breakdown by column with numbers and percentages, e.g., 104 million adults read a newspaper every day, more than the sports idiots who watch the Super Bowl. OK, but how broad is that survey: just the US, or North America, or the Western Hemisphere or just the world? No data is provided on when, where and how that magic 104 was determined.
After talking about percentages of how old reads what or people who say they would buy something seen in the paper, the NAA ad declares: “This is not a portrait of a dying industry…”
Item #2: Article in the New York Times, same date (Sept. 21), page B3. Headline: “Newspapers Have Not Hit Bottom, Analysts Say.”
This article mentions “The drop in combined print and digital ad revenue last year, 16.6 percent… was the worse since the Depression.” But such a decline, states reporter Richard Perez-Pena, is “rosy” compared to 2009 so far: first quarter saw a drop of 28.3 percent, followed by 29 percent in the second quarter.
The source for these figures cited by the NYT? The NAA, of course.
Item #1: Full page ad in the Monday, Sept. 21, 2009 edition of the Jerkwater Journal, the Plattsburgh’s daily newspaper. Another propaganda piece by the NAA, the Newspaper Association of America.
In big bold print: NUMBERS LIKE THESE ALWAYS LOOK GOOD ON PAPER.
Below the proclamation some people stand in a neat row, each reading the dead trees format.
While acknowledging that “the newspaper business has faced unprecedented challenges” in the last two years, the ad states the newspaper media (print and digital) is still a strong presence and will emerge after the “current environment” as a stronger multi-platform source of information.
Then there’s a breakdown by column with numbers and percentages, e.g., 104 million adults read a newspaper every day, more than the sports idiots who watch the Super Bowl. OK, but how broad is that survey: just the US, or North America, or the Western Hemisphere or just the world? No data is provided on when, where and how that magic 104 was determined.
After talking about percentages of how old reads what or people who say they would buy something seen in the paper, the NAA ad declares: “This is not a portrait of a dying industry…”
Item #2: Article in the New York Times, same date (Sept. 21), page B3. Headline: “Newspapers Have Not Hit Bottom, Analysts Say.”
This article mentions “The drop in combined print and digital ad revenue last year, 16.6 percent… was the worse since the Depression.” But such a decline, states reporter Richard Perez-Pena, is “rosy” compared to 2009 so far: first quarter saw a drop of 28.3 percent, followed by 29 percent in the second quarter.
The source for these figures cited by the NYT? The NAA, of course.
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