© 2008 Stan Spire
Bloated. Sitting on your couch, half-hypnotized by the TeeVee. You’re tired, unmotivated. That’s the way The Elitists want you most of the time: indifferent, unaware, but still pliable.
But you can’t loaf around all the time, mired in your abode. This is the time of the year that the Elitists (the Boss Hogs) want you and the other piglets to support their elegant lifestyle, Olympic swimming pools and private jets. It’s time to get you motivated, focused on their goals.
The TeeVee shouts: Big Sales! Grab the Bargains! Don’t Miss Out!
The Elitists appeal to your greedy piglet brain. You stir, ad after ad rousing you into a state of tremendous anticipation. You could enjoy an extra day off from work after the Thanksgiving holiday – but no! You have to get that One Perfect Xmas gift for a loved one. And at a low price. The race is on!
It’s called Black Friday because it helps the stores push their yearly sales up high, great profits. Only black, not red, ink is tolerated. Lots of black ink.
Black Friday also refers to the darkness of people’s souls. Whipped into a frenzy, the materialistic piglets allow their baser emotions to rule. The Elitists sit back and laugh, safe in their comfortable mansions, amused that their manipulations have once again succeeded.
One Xmas parents could only prove their love by buying their offspring a Tickle-Me Elmo doll. Adults acted like bratty kids in the store, pushing each other, to grab that One Perfect Xmas Gift.
Six months later I walked through a Wal-Mart and noticed a display of Tickle-Me Elmo dolls stacked up to the ceiling. People walked by. No one was excited. Yesterday’s news.
But you can’t wait for summer. You have to buy that One Perfect Gift NOW! Set the alarm clock and get up early. Show up at the store in the cold darkness, squeeze in, claiming your spot as part of the growing human tsunami.
You and your fellow beastlings herd outside the locked doors. The handmade sign proclaims: BLITZ LINE STARTS HERE. Pressing, pressing, ready to bolt and grab the bargains inside. At the split second the store swings open its gates, you storm into the retail fortress. Nothing can stand before the stampede. The quick or the dead.
And that’s how you trampled to death a Wal-Mart employee at a Long Island store on Black Friday, 2008.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Damn Dem Dere Hindooz
© 2008 Stan Spire
According to an Associated Press article, some provincials in Massena, NY – one of the remote outposts of NENYland – don’t want their children exposed to yoga in high school because it indoctrinates students into Hindu rites.
A couple of teachers were using yoga exercises to relieve stress in their classrooms. The American Yoga Association says yoga predates Hinduism by many centuries. Hinduism and other world religions just adopted it.
But don’t tell that to Rev. Colin Lucid of Massena’s Calvary Baptist Church. He claims yoga, even in its basic form of relaxation techniques, is tied into Hinduism.
Sure. This reverend is “lucid,” all right.
What’s ironical is that parents against yoga in the classroom are bitching about the separation of church and state – that it should be enforced in this case. Apparently they think yoga is Hinduism in disguise, sneaking in, trying to brainwash their kids. But would they object if Baptist breathing exercises were being offered?
Another religious group, creationists, rants against the church-state boundary line, especially when they try to sneak their beliefs into the classroom under the guise of “Intelligent Design.” Religionists want it their way, no one else’s. So if they can’t have their God in the classroom, they use the church-state argument to keep out other beliefs they dislike by saying those beliefs are “religious.”
For Reverend Lucid and his followers, only their “truth” matters. In the marketplace of ideas, they don’t want a free market. Strange, alien ideas have to be kept away at all costs like deadly viruses. What is going on in Massena is a mindturf war. Essentially xenophobes are saying: “We like the way we think and our kids will think the same way, so don’t confuse us with other non-Christian concepts or anything we consider to be non-Christian.”
A harsh view? Consider this statement by Rev. Lucid in the AP article, explaining that the controversy has been blown out of proportion:
“People have made it a religious war, and it’s not a religious war. We are basically concerned parents, saying we don’t want our children participating in something that could cause them more stress and confusion.”
So what’s causing the stress and confusion – the yoga or the controversy? So far the yoga has been successful in relieving stress before exams. Also, participation is voluntary.
NENYland – the northeastern corner of New York State – has seen great changes over the centuries. Newspapers, radio and TV have made it less isolated. Free education has also exposed its rural citizens to the outside world.
So the backward dirt-poor hick with the outhouse in back has vanished, the kind of person who thought the earth is flat and God was in heaven, favoring the USA over all other countries.
Ask such a person about Hinduism and he would’ve replied:
“What’s dat, Hindooz? Sounds like one of dem dere commies.”
And while that stereotype has disappeared from view, his mindset still lives on.
Source: Yoga at NY high school causes stress among critics – Associated Press
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jP6rnvYvkgYYuJCU68p5VrzvT2cQD93ILR6O3
According to an Associated Press article, some provincials in Massena, NY – one of the remote outposts of NENYland – don’t want their children exposed to yoga in high school because it indoctrinates students into Hindu rites.
A couple of teachers were using yoga exercises to relieve stress in their classrooms. The American Yoga Association says yoga predates Hinduism by many centuries. Hinduism and other world religions just adopted it.
But don’t tell that to Rev. Colin Lucid of Massena’s Calvary Baptist Church. He claims yoga, even in its basic form of relaxation techniques, is tied into Hinduism.
Sure. This reverend is “lucid,” all right.
What’s ironical is that parents against yoga in the classroom are bitching about the separation of church and state – that it should be enforced in this case. Apparently they think yoga is Hinduism in disguise, sneaking in, trying to brainwash their kids. But would they object if Baptist breathing exercises were being offered?
Another religious group, creationists, rants against the church-state boundary line, especially when they try to sneak their beliefs into the classroom under the guise of “Intelligent Design.” Religionists want it their way, no one else’s. So if they can’t have their God in the classroom, they use the church-state argument to keep out other beliefs they dislike by saying those beliefs are “religious.”
For Reverend Lucid and his followers, only their “truth” matters. In the marketplace of ideas, they don’t want a free market. Strange, alien ideas have to be kept away at all costs like deadly viruses. What is going on in Massena is a mindturf war. Essentially xenophobes are saying: “We like the way we think and our kids will think the same way, so don’t confuse us with other non-Christian concepts or anything we consider to be non-Christian.”
A harsh view? Consider this statement by Rev. Lucid in the AP article, explaining that the controversy has been blown out of proportion:
“People have made it a religious war, and it’s not a religious war. We are basically concerned parents, saying we don’t want our children participating in something that could cause them more stress and confusion.”
So what’s causing the stress and confusion – the yoga or the controversy? So far the yoga has been successful in relieving stress before exams. Also, participation is voluntary.
NENYland – the northeastern corner of New York State – has seen great changes over the centuries. Newspapers, radio and TV have made it less isolated. Free education has also exposed its rural citizens to the outside world.
So the backward dirt-poor hick with the outhouse in back has vanished, the kind of person who thought the earth is flat and God was in heaven, favoring the USA over all other countries.
Ask such a person about Hinduism and he would’ve replied:
“What’s dat, Hindooz? Sounds like one of dem dere commies.”
And while that stereotype has disappeared from view, his mindset still lives on.
Source: Yoga at NY high school causes stress among critics – Associated Press
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jP6rnvYvkgYYuJCU68p5VrzvT2cQD93ILR6O3
Monday, September 15, 2008
Fun Facts: The War of 1812
© 2008 Stan Spire
-- Francis Scott Key plagiarized the tune from an English beer drinking song to write the “Star Spangled Banner.” The original song, “To Anacreon In Heaven,” has pagan lyrics referring to Olympus, “The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus’ vine." The perfect source for the national anthem of a “Christian” nation. So the next time the SSB is played, stand up, hand over your heart, and think about Venus’s “myrtle.”
-- The British invaded Washington DC and set fire to the place, burning the White House. Those bastards! (Ignore anyone who tells you that previous to this event, America invaded Canada and set fire to York, Upper Canada. No enemy has the right to imitate our unjustifiable actions during a war. Especially torture.)
-- The War of 1812 is hardly remembered in Britain. It’s overshadowed by the fun the English had with Napoleon Bonaparte at the same time.
-- The War of 1812 is hardly remembered in America. More people on the street know more about the latest Hollywood scandal with some strung-out actress in rehab than they do the history of their country. (That’s why so many morons vote Republican.)
-- Francis Scott Key plagiarized the tune from an English beer drinking song to write the “Star Spangled Banner.” The original song, “To Anacreon In Heaven,” has pagan lyrics referring to Olympus, “The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus’ vine." The perfect source for the national anthem of a “Christian” nation. So the next time the SSB is played, stand up, hand over your heart, and think about Venus’s “myrtle.”
-- The British invaded Washington DC and set fire to the place, burning the White House. Those bastards! (Ignore anyone who tells you that previous to this event, America invaded Canada and set fire to York, Upper Canada. No enemy has the right to imitate our unjustifiable actions during a war. Especially torture.)
-- The War of 1812 is hardly remembered in Britain. It’s overshadowed by the fun the English had with Napoleon Bonaparte at the same time.
-- The War of 1812 is hardly remembered in America. More people on the street know more about the latest Hollywood scandal with some strung-out actress in rehab than they do the history of their country. (That’s why so many morons vote Republican.)
BOP: What Were You Celebrating?
© 2008 Stan Spire
So another Battle of Plattsburgh (BOP) celebration has come and gone. But what was the point?
Remembering and honoring those who fought in a decisive battle on Lake Champlain during the War of 1812? Making people aware of the historical events, the forces that brought the United States into conflict with England?
Or was it just an opportunity to get money out of wallets in downtown Plattsburgh to boost the economy? With each celebration, what is more important: promoting history or hawking greasy Italian sausage sandwiches?
It’s a tired but true cliché: Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.
In the run up to the War of 1812 war hawks in congress wanted to do more than just make the British back off and leave American sea vessels alone. Some saw this as an opportunity for expansion to the north: Canada. Why, American soldiers would march in and be greeted as liberators from the big bad British.
It didn’t work out that way, even though former President Thomas Jefferson had stated "the acquisition of Canada this year, as far as the neighbourhood of Quebec, will be a mere matter of marching.” A cakewalk. Mission accomplished. The French people of Quebec obviously didn’t love the British but they were suspicious of American “liberators.”
Of course, history never repeats itself.
So another Battle of Plattsburgh (BOP) celebration has come and gone. But what was the point?
Remembering and honoring those who fought in a decisive battle on Lake Champlain during the War of 1812? Making people aware of the historical events, the forces that brought the United States into conflict with England?
Or was it just an opportunity to get money out of wallets in downtown Plattsburgh to boost the economy? With each celebration, what is more important: promoting history or hawking greasy Italian sausage sandwiches?
It’s a tired but true cliché: Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.
In the run up to the War of 1812 war hawks in congress wanted to do more than just make the British back off and leave American sea vessels alone. Some saw this as an opportunity for expansion to the north: Canada. Why, American soldiers would march in and be greeted as liberators from the big bad British.
It didn’t work out that way, even though former President Thomas Jefferson had stated "the acquisition of Canada this year, as far as the neighbourhood of Quebec, will be a mere matter of marching.” A cakewalk. Mission accomplished. The French people of Quebec obviously didn’t love the British but they were suspicious of American “liberators.”
Of course, history never repeats itself.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Turkeynecks And Dyeing Men
© 2008 Stan Spire
Women are big suckers for cosmetic crap.
TeeVee is littered with ads and infomercials for various skin products that are supposed to erase any signs of aging for women getting long in the tooth. A spokeswoman – usually some over-the-hill actress – will go on about how her facial product will make any hag look like a teenager.
Of course, the spokeswoman does look young for her age. But with the same make-up and special lighting and camera filters and plastic surgery to boot, a trilobite would look sexier and younger.
If you pay attention, check out the spokeswoman’s saggy, wrinkly neck. No flaws with her face; they all moved down into her throat area. (Better stay out of the woods during turkey hunting season.)
Well, at least one spokeswoman is smart enough to cover up her gobbler skin with an array of sparkling jewelry hanging around her neck.
Men are big suckers for cosmetic crap.
Got some gray on top of your head? Cover it up with this product. No one will notice.
“Joe, you look different but I can’t figure it out. Did you lose some weight?”
Naw, Joe just flooded his scalp with black dye. Overnight his salt and pepper hair has disappeared. Now he looks like a middle-aged chump with shoe polish saturating his follicles.
When this gray-covering crap first appeared on the market, the manufacturer had to deal with the stigma of men using dye like age-worried women. There was something – well, unmanly about it. So the TeeVee ads would stress that product would be found at most drugstores in THE MENS SECTION. The announcer’s deep voice would reassure the male viewer that real men do use hair dye. After all, it was being sold in THE MENS SECTION. Why, you would go to that particular aisle and see beefy lumberjacks and pro football players buying the stuff.
In fact one recent commercial uses the he-man sports angle to hawk hair dye to men. Two guys carry on like sportscasters, following the “game” of a graybeard trying to score in a singles bar with a younger woman, a luscious blonde. But she’s turned off by the graybeard’s lack of completely dark hair.
So the scene is played again but this time, note the sportscasters, the graybeard is now a blackbeard (while remaining a bluebeard through it all.) The woman responds to his advance and blackbeard goes home with her. The two sportscasters follow the couple to an apartment house, standing outside with their mikes, proclaiming the man has “scored.” The commercial ends with the two sportscasters lurking outside the apartment window, two losers hanging around for the “color commentary.”
And married men are also targeted. There’s this “cute” TeeVee ad featuring two young girls bugging their father to hide any natural signs of aging. The girls want him to use a special product from THE MENS SECTION. They’re so happy when their father gives in. Even Mom is happy. Her female offspring pussywhipped her husband into doing some silly, proving what she has always suspected: Dad ain’t a real man.
Mom applies her age-defying facial lotion and touches up her hair dye. It’s time to trawl for a stud.
Women are big suckers for cosmetic crap.
TeeVee is littered with ads and infomercials for various skin products that are supposed to erase any signs of aging for women getting long in the tooth. A spokeswoman – usually some over-the-hill actress – will go on about how her facial product will make any hag look like a teenager.
Of course, the spokeswoman does look young for her age. But with the same make-up and special lighting and camera filters and plastic surgery to boot, a trilobite would look sexier and younger.
If you pay attention, check out the spokeswoman’s saggy, wrinkly neck. No flaws with her face; they all moved down into her throat area. (Better stay out of the woods during turkey hunting season.)
Well, at least one spokeswoman is smart enough to cover up her gobbler skin with an array of sparkling jewelry hanging around her neck.
Men are big suckers for cosmetic crap.
Got some gray on top of your head? Cover it up with this product. No one will notice.
“Joe, you look different but I can’t figure it out. Did you lose some weight?”
Naw, Joe just flooded his scalp with black dye. Overnight his salt and pepper hair has disappeared. Now he looks like a middle-aged chump with shoe polish saturating his follicles.
When this gray-covering crap first appeared on the market, the manufacturer had to deal with the stigma of men using dye like age-worried women. There was something – well, unmanly about it. So the TeeVee ads would stress that product would be found at most drugstores in THE MENS SECTION. The announcer’s deep voice would reassure the male viewer that real men do use hair dye. After all, it was being sold in THE MENS SECTION. Why, you would go to that particular aisle and see beefy lumberjacks and pro football players buying the stuff.
In fact one recent commercial uses the he-man sports angle to hawk hair dye to men. Two guys carry on like sportscasters, following the “game” of a graybeard trying to score in a singles bar with a younger woman, a luscious blonde. But she’s turned off by the graybeard’s lack of completely dark hair.
So the scene is played again but this time, note the sportscasters, the graybeard is now a blackbeard (while remaining a bluebeard through it all.) The woman responds to his advance and blackbeard goes home with her. The two sportscasters follow the couple to an apartment house, standing outside with their mikes, proclaiming the man has “scored.” The commercial ends with the two sportscasters lurking outside the apartment window, two losers hanging around for the “color commentary.”
And married men are also targeted. There’s this “cute” TeeVee ad featuring two young girls bugging their father to hide any natural signs of aging. The girls want him to use a special product from THE MENS SECTION. They’re so happy when their father gives in. Even Mom is happy. Her female offspring pussywhipped her husband into doing some silly, proving what she has always suspected: Dad ain’t a real man.
Mom applies her age-defying facial lotion and touches up her hair dye. It’s time to trawl for a stud.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Batman, Shatman
© 2008 Stan Spire
The new Batman movie is greater than the return of Jesus! Everyone says so, ergo it must be true. Especially the TeeVee nooz and all those late night talk shows.
Heath Ledger. Why he deserves an Oscar award for his portrayal of the Joker. And don’t say anything bad about him. He died from an accidental overdose. Tragic. Ergo, his performance is critic-proof. Greater than Jesus dying on the cross.
So since everyone in the lamestream media says the new Batman movie – The Dork Knight Returns or whatever it’s called - is so fucking great, I won’t have to see it. It would be so great that I couldn’t handle it.
Too bad Jack Nicholson didn’t die when he portrayed the Joker in the previous series of Batman movies. He sucked as the Joker. Overrated ham. But I can say that because he didn’t die: he’s alive and not critic-proof.
Then there’s Marlon Brando who sucked even more in another superhero series, Superman, with Christopher Reeves in the title role. The magnificent Marlon portrayed Superman’s Kryptonian father, Jor-El, as a pretentious albino. Oops, Brando is dead. I’ll have to retract that criticism.
After I die no one can say anything bad about me. It’s not nice to speak ill of corpses.
The new Batman movie is greater than the return of Jesus! Everyone says so, ergo it must be true. Especially the TeeVee nooz and all those late night talk shows.
Heath Ledger. Why he deserves an Oscar award for his portrayal of the Joker. And don’t say anything bad about him. He died from an accidental overdose. Tragic. Ergo, his performance is critic-proof. Greater than Jesus dying on the cross.
So since everyone in the lamestream media says the new Batman movie – The Dork Knight Returns or whatever it’s called - is so fucking great, I won’t have to see it. It would be so great that I couldn’t handle it.
Too bad Jack Nicholson didn’t die when he portrayed the Joker in the previous series of Batman movies. He sucked as the Joker. Overrated ham. But I can say that because he didn’t die: he’s alive and not critic-proof.
Then there’s Marlon Brando who sucked even more in another superhero series, Superman, with Christopher Reeves in the title role. The magnificent Marlon portrayed Superman’s Kryptonian father, Jor-El, as a pretentious albino. Oops, Brando is dead. I’ll have to retract that criticism.
After I die no one can say anything bad about me. It’s not nice to speak ill of corpses.
The Next-To-Nothing Advantage
©2008 Stan Spire
Being down and almost out does have a couple of advantages.
Despite the economy going down the toilet thanks to our boob president, I don’t have to worry about losing my car or home.
But the main advantage is that I have time to read, research, and know a bit more about all the bullshit going on with the Elite who control this country.
The Elite wants the average Joe or Jane working long hours, fretting about paying bills, so that they’re too distracted to be aware of what is really going on. That’s how the Elite sold America on the War in Iraq. Most people were too busy to look behind the claims: weapons of mass destruction, Saddam was behind 9/11, all the lies. Joe and Jane were trying to get through another day. Sound bites are easy to digest. In-depth analysis takes time to chew on.
And when Joe and Jane America did have some free time, it was spent relaxing, catching a break from the daily grind. They didn’t have the energy to question the Big Lies from the White House. After all, George W must know what he’s doing: he was elected president.
The Elite don’t want anyone to have too much free time. After all, citizens might notice the smell of the stuff being shoveled down on them.
But the Elite are really screwing things up. With the economy sliding into a depression, people will be laid off, stuck at home, nowhere to go. And like me, they will have plenty of opportunity to think and challenge the BS.
Being down and almost out does have a couple of advantages.
Despite the economy going down the toilet thanks to our boob president, I don’t have to worry about losing my car or home.
But the main advantage is that I have time to read, research, and know a bit more about all the bullshit going on with the Elite who control this country.
The Elite wants the average Joe or Jane working long hours, fretting about paying bills, so that they’re too distracted to be aware of what is really going on. That’s how the Elite sold America on the War in Iraq. Most people were too busy to look behind the claims: weapons of mass destruction, Saddam was behind 9/11, all the lies. Joe and Jane were trying to get through another day. Sound bites are easy to digest. In-depth analysis takes time to chew on.
And when Joe and Jane America did have some free time, it was spent relaxing, catching a break from the daily grind. They didn’t have the energy to question the Big Lies from the White House. After all, George W must know what he’s doing: he was elected president.
The Elite don’t want anyone to have too much free time. After all, citizens might notice the smell of the stuff being shoveled down on them.
But the Elite are really screwing things up. With the economy sliding into a depression, people will be laid off, stuck at home, nowhere to go. And like me, they will have plenty of opportunity to think and challenge the BS.
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