Sunday, April 13, 2008

The Golden Age of Cradle Robbing

© 2008 Stan Spire


Teachers shouldn’t be dating students. At least, that’s become a big taboo over the years since I was in high school.

My school was rural, centralized. Back in the day it wasn’t uncommon for a male teacher, fresh out of college, to date one of the babes in the senior class.

One girl in my graduating class was all smiles on the last day of school, wearing a sparkling engagement ring. She had been stepping out with a science teacher. I guess she got special tutoring in biology.

There were at least three cases of male teachers bagging babes from various senior classes at Cowflop Central around the time of my imprisonment.

One day I was sitting in study hall. The desks were shoved together, side by side, to squeeze in the maximum amount of cabbages in neat rows. I was in the front row, near the teacher’s desk.

A senior babe was to my right, lost in her thought. (I do mean thought, not thoughts; she was a stereotypical blonde.)

I noticed the absentee list on the teacher’s desk. I reached over, only cutting across a small corner of the desk on my right. I glanced at the list, ascertained one of my friends wasn’t around that day, and then placed the sheet back on the teacher’s desk.

The study hall teacher noticed my action, thinking it was inappropriate.

“You know,” he said, “you supposed to excuse yourself when you reach in front of someone.”

“Really,” I replied. I glanced at the babe next to me. “Sorry, she blends into the woodwork so well, I didn’t see her.”

The teacher’s face became red –- not with embarrassment, but with rage. He sat there and boiled.

I found out later the pretty blonde senior next to me was his girlfriend.

Tough luck, ya pedophile.


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